10 Shocking Narcissist Traits Your Loved Ones Might Be Hiding—Are You Ready to See the Truth?

Ever wonder if that one person in your life who always just happens to be the victim is actually starring in their very own one-person drama? Could it be that their need for endless compliments and attention isn’t just quirky, but a little more… clinical? The word “narcissist” gets tossed around so much these days—especially on social media—that honestly, most of us have lost track of what it even means. It’s not just about the buzzwords like “ghosting” or “gaslighting” that everyone loves to drop in the dating world. Nope, narcissism digs way deeper, involving a cocktail of grandiose self-importance, a craving for admiration, and that glaring lack of empathy that can really mess with your head and heart. Luckily, a savvy psychotherapist named Alishia Portas has boiled it down into 10 telltale signs you might spot in someone close to you—no PhD required. Ready to decode the narcissistic whirlwind next door? Let’s get into it. LEARN MORE

A qualified psychotherapist has revealed 10 key signs that could mean somebody in your life is a narcissist.

The term is thrown around so much nowadays, and it’s likely a lot of people will have confused the true meaning of the term with other words on social media.

While other viral terms such as ‘gaslighting’ and ‘ghosting’ are often associated with narcissism, especially in the dating world, it’s far more in-depth than that.

You can blame the internet for misconstruing your take on what the word might mean, but it’s given the condition a platform, and experts have since come out and educated users on what narcissism really looks like.

So, what exactly is narcissism and what signs can you look out for that could mean someone close to you has it?

There are several ways to spot a narcissist (Getty Stock Image)

What is a narcissist?

A narcissist is someone who, in health terms, has been diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD).

Someone that has NPD can be defined as an individual that has, above all, a grandiose sense of self-importance.

While there are several ‘easy tests’ you can carry out to see if someone has narcissistic tendencies, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-V) says that the mental health condition is related to a ‘pervasive pattern of grandiosity’.

It adds that they have a ‘constant need for admiration’, as well as a ‘lack of empathy’.

But now, a qualified psychotherapist has highlighted 10 ways you can identify a narcissist who is close to you in a TikTok clip that has garnered over 2.7 million views.

Alishia Portas is known as @ali-psychotherapist on the platform, where she raises awareness of the condition.

Narcissism can cause a strain in relationships (Getty Stock Image)

Ways to spot a narcissist

Always the victim

The content creator wrote on her first slide: “They always change the narrative so they appear as the victim.”

Aiming to help those who may be victim to narcissistic abuse, the co-founder of Phoenix Counselling Services explained that deflecting responsibility in situations can signal someone is a narcissist.

A lot of attention

The Brit wrote that ‘they always need excessive validation, praise, compliments and attention’, adding on the next slide that they can even get ‘incredibly jealous when you try to have a life’, which involves most forms of socialising with family or friends.

Doubting you

She wrote that if they’re ‘always’ questioning and doubting you, whether that be through criticism or making you feel worthless, it could be a sign of narcissism.

They’re always right

“It’s their way or the highway—there is no room for compromise,” she wrote, highlighting their refusal to meet in the middle.

Refusing to hold their hands up when they’re in the wrong is a tell-tale sign of narcissism (Getty Stock Images)

Obsessive tendencies

Portas wrote: “If you manage to go no contact, they will stalk you, spy on you or harass you. This might be through social media, other people, or in person.”

She added on the next slide: “They will use triangulation—recruiting people close to you in the hop of getting them on their side.”

Expecting to be the top priority

The final three slides explain that narcissists expect to be the centre of your life, with one reading: “They expect to be the most important thing in your life every second of every day.”

Portas added that you could even be dealing with rage or violence if you don’t do something as small as ‘answer their calls or texts instantly’.

“They will isolate you from everyone and everything until you no longer recognise yourself,” she added, speaking about their importance to be the be-all and end-all of your existence.

She concluded: “They will love bomb you when their grip on you starts to loosen.

“You’ll think they’ve changed and try to see their good points, only to be disappointed again and again,” the psychotherapist warned.