Trump’s Shocking Move: What Really Happened When He Targeted Musk’s Mars?

Is it possible to declare war on an entire planet just because a billionaire gave your bill a thumbs-down emoji? Apparently, in the wild, meme-laden arena of 2025 politics—absolutely! The only thing more combustible than President Trump’s temper is, evidently, Mars itself, especially when Elon Musk won’t stop tweeting from his red-planet bachelor pad. My jaw dropped (after a good laugh) imagining the ultimate billionaire spat cranking up nuclear codes like it’s just another Friday noise complaint. How did we get to a reality where interplanetary feuds outshine congressional hearings? And more importantly, who’s going to clean up all that Martian fallout? Buckle up for the kind of absurdity that makes “House of Cards” look like “Sesame Street.” <a href="https://theonion.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/06/TrumpEscalates-NIB-IHA-PHcopy.jpg”>LEARN MORE

WASHINGTON—After days of listening to the tech billionaire criticize his ‘Big Beautiful Bill,’ President Donald Trump escalated his feud with Elon Musk Friday by nuking Mars. “Elon was ‘wearing thin,’ I asked him to leave, and then I blew up his stupid planet that no one else cared about,” Trump wrote in a post on Truth Social just moments after launching the entire U.S. stockpile of nuclear weapons in outer space. “I don’t mind Elon turning against me, but I should have blown up Mars months ago. This is one of the Greatest Bills ever presented to Congress. Good luck WITH YOUR COLONY NOW!” At press time, Musk tweeted that Trump only blew up Mars because the planet knew what the president had done with Jeffrey Epstein.