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“Grief is already heavy, but when it’s not acknowledged, it becomes a silent struggle,” notes Griffey. “Your pain is real, and you deserve space to feel it.”
When a person we’re close to loses a pet, we should support them with our presence
Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)
Since disenfranchised grief doesn’t usually comply with societal norms, a lot of people might be confused about how to comfort the person they’re close with when they lose their pet.
“A grieving pet guardian will unlikely have the energy or the emotional capacity to inform a loved one how to treat them and how to act around them,” adds Hazell. “The grieving person may be doing their utmost to survive the emotional torment and oftentimes, can be living on an hour-to-hour basis, such is the enormity of pet loss to some.”
Therefore, when a person we’re close to loses a pet, experts recommend helping them with our presence without trying to fix their pain. This is the most meaningful support we can give to grieving pet owners, says Griffey. To further comfort and support the grieving pet owner, she additionally suggests the following:
• Listen without judgment, criticism, or trying to analyze their grief.
• Keep checking in, even weeks or months later — grief doesn’t end after a few days.
• Let them know they’re on your mind — bring a cooked meal, offer help with errands, or just go for a walk together.
• Gently ask if they’d like to talk about their pet — sharing memories can be healing.
• Give a small pet memorial gift or look through photos and videos together.
• And most importantly — be honest. It’s okay to say, ‘I don’t know what to say,’ as long as you’re showing up with care.
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