30 Bizarre Customer Blunders That Will Make You Question Reality
Ever found yourself in a situation so bafflingly absurd that you just had to pause and wonder, “Is this real life or did I walk into an alternate universe?” From conspiracy theories about human embryos in soda to folks confusing a music store for an electronics outlet, these tales of utterly confused customers will have you shaking your head and chuckling in disbelief. You might think you’ve seen it all after a decade in marketing and SEO—trust me, nothing prepares you for the craziness that happens when folks take a sharp nosedive from the “confused tree” and hit every branch on the way down. So buckle up, because you’re about to dive into a world where logic took a wrong turn somewhere near the drive-thru. LEARN MORE
I’ve told this story tons of times to my friends/family because it’s one of my favorite Domino’s Stories. This happened somewhere around 2017-2018.
One day it was really slow at work at Domino’s. I was still a relatively new Insider (only a few months in to what would be about 4 years) and still in school, so I was hoping that it would stay slow so I could go home so I can cheat on my math homework, play some League of Legends, and get some sleep since my school started an hour earlier than other schools in the area. A woman, probably mid-40s, comes in to order a pizza. She’s pretty chill, and we’re just chatting while she’s ordering because there really isn’t much to do otherwise since we already cleaned the store and oven and all that.
After she gets her pizza all done up I ask her if she’d like any drinks. She’s like “oh what do you guys have?” I’m running down the drink options and she notices Coca-Cola and looks at me wide-eyed like she just saw someone get hit by a car.
“DON’T YOU KNOW THEY PUT HUMAN EMBRYOS IN COKE?!?!”
“^^^I’m ^^^sorry??”
She then spends the next SEVEN. MINUTES. Running down pretty much every major conspiracy, from human embryos in Coca-Cola to Flat Earth to the moon landing being faked, etc. If you think of a pre-COVID conspiracy, she hit it. And she tied it all up in a neat little bow of “It’s all the Jews.”
I’m stunlocked. The only words that can come out of my mouth are “………….. so no on the drink?”
“Coke Zero please. :)”
I guess the Zero means “Zero Embryos.”
I had a car for sale and an influencer called me up and said they would like to use my car for a podcast.
They said “You need to have your car at” and I cut them off and said “I am sorry did you just tell me that I need to deliver a car you are asking to borrow for no money”? They said “Yeah”. I said “Oh, okay, just send me a retainer of 1/4 the price of the car and you can borrow it, I don’t know you”. She said “I don’t have that much money”. I said “Well I do, so who the hell in their right mind tells the person they are asking for a favor where to be and what to do”? She got really angry and explained to me “Who she was”. Then told me “I can destroy your business in minutes with a negative comment”. I couldn’t stop laughing, I am an architect and normally work for corporations. She said “The people do as I demand and I have 90,000 followers”. I said “Cool have every one of your followers send you $ so you can borrow my car” and then hung up. I got 4 emails from her loyal followers…4.
I was in Lowes one morning right after they opened. There was a woman at the service desk having a complete melt down yelling and screaming because Lowes didn’t have a licensed contractor there at the store for her to hire. She apparently woke up that morning and decided she needed a deck like that same day and thought she could just go to Lowes and have someone immediately start building a deck. It was dead so I stood with the cashier listening to the show. They ended up having to call the police to get her to leave.
Customers at my retail job explaining that COVID passports are the mark of the beast and check-in QR codes are a means of tracking us all… while paying for the groceries electronically via their phone.
And those eager to let me know that the mask I’m wearing traps bacteria and causes cancer… while in the process of purchasing cigarettes.
At my friend’s wool shop, I was checking out the latest shipment she had just finished putting on the shelves, when this crazy lady walks in, makes a beeline for the counter, and just screams that she wants her hair cut now.
Cue my friend blinking in shock because that was very much not how her usual clientele behaved.
She pulls herself together, and goes:
“-Madam, I’m afraid the only thing that will be cut short here is our tempers. In case you haven’t noticed, this is a wool shop, and has been for the last seven years.
-I. DON’T. CARE! YOU WILL CUT MY HAIR IF YOU KNOW WHAT’S GOOD FOR… Pardon?
-Wool. Shop.”
She reaches on the shelf next to her and picks up a huge ball of yarn with size 50 needles sticking out of it, plonks it down in front of the lady and crosses her arms.
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