“Unlock the Secrets to Building a Book Club Everyone Wants to Join!”
In a world where our digital lives have become a swirling vortex of isolation, it’s hard not to feel that heavy weight of loneliness just creeping in. Millions of Americans find themselves in that boat—doomed to scroll endlessly through their screens while devilish thoughts kick in about how nice it would be to actually chat with someone who isn’t an AI… or worse, a cat video! Enter the humble book club, a delightful antidote for socializing that’s been lurking right under our noses, offering a structured way for book lovers across all ages to come together. But before you rush off to book your cozy nook for the first gathering, hold your horses! The Onion has got a hilariously snarky guide to help you kickstart that book club dream you’ve been nurturing. Forget the usual clichés and brace yourself for tongue-in-cheek tips that are as insightful as they are ridiculous. Care to challenge your friends with a tome written in an ancient, untranslatable language? Or perhaps you’d consider administering pop quizzes to ensure everyone’s keeping pace? This isn’t just about reading; it’s about wielding the power of literature like the social sorcerer you were born to be! So grab your reading glasses and a sense of humor, because here come the unorthodox tips for starting your very own book club!
With the loneliness epidemic impacting millions of Americans, book clubs offer a simple and structured way for readers of all ages to socialize. The Onion shares tips for starting your own book club.
- Seek out fellow readers by blackmailing a librarian into giving up names.
- Choose the day of the month that works best for everyone to cancel on.
- Make sure you have a good mix of people who will keep the book discussion going and people you actually like.
- Select one of three books not banned by your state.
- Establish a rotation order for club members to take turns shooting down each other’s book suggestions.
- Bookmark the Dictionary.com page for “glib” for easy future reference.
- Challenge your club with a book written in an ancient, untranslatable language.
- Establish independent election monitors to maintain legitimacy of the book selection process.
- Spend five to six years seeking your doctorate in comparative literature so you can absolutely smoke your friends with your opinion on A Court Of Thorns And Roses.
- Keep your meetings on topic by dressing in an intimidating leather outfit and occasionally cracking your knuckles.
- Make sure that everyone is hitting their page goals by administering regular pop quizzes, a midterm, and a final.
- Spread the hosting duties around so that, a few months from now, you can easily shed yourself of this albatross of a social commitment once and for all.
The post Tips For Starting A Book Club appeared first on The Onion.
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