“Moo Deng Faces Rivalry: Will the New Chubby Pygmy Hippo Steal Its Spotlight?”
In the wild world of internet fame, there’s always a fear of being usurped—just ask Moo Deng, the beloved pygmy hippo sensation stationed in a Thai zoo! This chubby cherub finds herself caught in a spiraling whirlwind of anxiety over the threat of a much feistier, and let’s face it, adorably plump rival crashing her joy ride. Imagine staring into a puddle and contemplating the tumultuous tides of fame while worrying that a single snapshot of a watermelon-chomping hippo baby clad in extra fluff could derail everything! It’s like a reality show waiting to unfold—will Moo Deng cling to her throne or get usurped in a hilarious twist of fate? If the saga of this social media darling, reminiscent of the 2017 sensation Fiona, proves anything, it’s that even the most chubby stars can find themselves starring in a tragic fall from grace! So, grab your snacks and your camera because this is a tale of weight, wit, and woeful competition that you won’t want to miss! LEARN MORE.
SI RACHA, THAILAND—Expressing concern over how long the joy ride would last, internet phenom and zoo resident Moo Deng told reporters Friday she was worried a chubbier, feistier pygmy hippo was coming to take this all away. “I’ve sacrificed everything to get where I am—everything—but it will disappear in an instant if some plucky upstart pygmy hippo comes along who’s so fat she can’t even run without adorably tripping over herself,†said Deng, staring at her reflection in a puddle as she ruminated about how just a single photo of a delightfully plump hippo baby eating a watermelon would be enough to bring everything crashing down. “Even the chubbiest of hippos don’t stay on top forever, I know that. When you’re No. 1, there’s always some sloth or otter trying to take you down. Hell, if it happened to [2017 social media star] Fiona the hippo, it could happen to me.†At press time, a zoo spokesperson confirmed Moo Deng was seeking help for abusing anti-growth hormones in an attempt to stay small forever.
The post Moo Deng Worried Chubbier, Feistier Pygmy Hippo Coming To Take This All Away appeared first on The Onion.
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