“FEMA Drops Bombshell: What ‘That’s Crazy’ Really Means for Disaster Relief in America!”

In a world where natural disasters are almost as common as viral TikTok challenges, you’d think the experts would use a bit more seriousness to address them. However, it seems the folks at the Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA) took a rather unorthodox approach in response to the devastation caused by Hurricane Helene. As the waters rose and homes turned into floating islands, FEMA’s own administrator, Deanne Criswell, decided to display her disbelief in the most relatable way possible—by exclaiming, “Damn, that’s crazy!” Who knew disaster management could resemble a group of friends texting each other memes while watching calamity unfold? While they analyzed flooding clips from the Carolinas, Georgia, and Florida, their awe turned into what can only be described as Waterworld-inspired amusement. So, what’s next? Will FEMA host a watch party for disaster flicks? Dive in and brace yourself for the hilarity that ensued amidst the chaos. LEARN MORE.

WASHINGTON—Gawking at the widespread destruction caused by Hurricane Helene across much of the southeastern United States, the Federal Emergency Management Agency issued a statement Monday announcing, “Damn, that’s crazy.” “So much water, dude,” said administrator Deanne Criswell, who uploaded a YouTube compilation of flooding in the Carolinas, Georgia, and Florida to the homepage of FEMA.gov as several other FEMA officials gathered around her computer, exclaiming “Oh shit!” and begging her to replay the video. “Houses shouldn’t do that. That house is like a boat now. This is like Armageddon shit, man. Wait, have you guys seen the movie Armageddon?” At press time, reports confirmed the FEMA employees had moved on to watching clips from Armageddon. 

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The post ‘Damn, That’s Crazy,’ Announces FEMA In Statement appeared first on The Onion.

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