“Uncovering the Ticketmaster Monopoly: How 80% of Middle School Talent Shows Are Controlled Behind the Curtain”
In a startling reveal that’s sure to make you spit out your midday snack, a new report has uncovered that Ticketmaster—yep, the giant behind those infamous ticket prices—holds a staggering 80% control over America’s middle school talent shows! I mean, who knew the path to stardom for your kid’s third-grade saxophone solo could come with a $300 price tag? According to researcher Alyssa Cade, this monopoly has turned innocent performances of “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star” into high-stakes, wallet-busting events where parents are left scrambling for cash like they’re at a yard sale! With scammers and bots reaping the benefits of this cutthroat resale market, the average parent is left feeling more like a contestant on a reality show than a proud mom or dad. And just when you think it couldn’t get any worse, Ticketmaster justifies it all by saying everyone should get a slice of that pie—including schools. So, the question remains—when did our kids’ talent shows turn into a financial circus? To dive deeper into this bizarre and somewhat comical reality, LEARN MORE.
WEST HOLLYWOOD, CA—In a new revelation shedding further light on the ticket sales and distribution giant’s alleged monopoly, a bombshell report published Tuesday found that Ticketmaster controls 80% of America’s middle school talent shows. “Ticketmaster retains the exclusive booking rights to thousands of middle school auditoriums across the country, creating an out-of-control resale market that prices out parents hoping to see their children perform amateur flute solos or tap routines set to Kidz Bop renditions of pop songs,” said researcher and report co-author Alyssa Cade, whose findings also revealed that scammers and bots take advantage of Ticketmaster’s stranglehold on talent shows, often reselling tickets for 10 times their original price. “This monopoly means that Ticketmaster is essentially engaging in price-gouging, forcing parents to spend $200 to $300 on a ticket that was originally guaranteed with the donation of one canned good.” Reached for comment, Ticketmaster defended its sales practices by claiming it was only fair that both the company and middle schools received a cut of sales.
