“Salvadoran President’s Shocking Claim: Is Lack of Humanity the Price of Justice?”

In an age where empathy seems to be on the endangered species list, El Salvador’s President Nayib Bukele is making waves for his refreshingly blunt admission about a moral crisis plaguing both his country and ours. During a meeting with former President Donald Trump at the White House, Bukele outright declared that he “lacks the humanity” necessary to return Kilmar Abrego Garcia, a wrongfully deported legal resident of the U.S., to the land of the free. I mean, how often do you see a world leader just throw their hands up and say, “Hey, I’m totally dead inside!”? It’s almost like he took a page from a sitcom script—highlighting the absurdity of international diplomacy where compassion gets tossed out the window like yesterday’s trash. As Bukele explained how neither he nor his advisors could muster a shred of empathy for Garcia’s plight, one has to wonder if the whole episode is a poorly scripted dark comedy. Perhaps the real joke is that his candidness about emotional vacancy might just score him points with some—after all, cruelty does seem to have its fans these days! Curious to see where this twisted tale leads? <a href="https://theonion.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/04/SalvadoranPresidentClaims-NIB-PH.jpg”>LEARN MORE.

WASHINGTON—During a visit with President Donald Trump at the White House, El Salvador’s president Nayib Bukele claimed Monday that he “lacks the humanity” to return wrongly deported legal U.S. resident Kilmar Abrego Garcia back to America. “How can I return an innocent man to the United States when I don’t have the ability to feel empathy or compassion?” said Bukele, explaining that he’s consulted with his top advisors about the 29-year-old Maryland father being held in a Salvadoran prison, but none of them could find it in their hearts to care at all about the man’s situation. “Do you hear how ridiculous it sounds to expect that I could see myself reflected in another human being’s experience? Even if I wanted to, there’s no way I could acknowledge the plight of someone who is suffering because I am completely numb to the pain of others. My hands are tied because I’m totally dead inside.” At press time, President Trump had publicly thanked Bukele for his use of cruelty to project a facade of strength.