Unveiling the Double-Edged Sword: Should We Play God and Resurrect Lost Species?

Oh boy, here we go again with science playing God like they’re in a divine Survivor episode. You gotta ask yourself, did we really need to bring back the dire wolf? Was there an outcry for more fearsome fauna, or are we just that bored? Colossal Biosciences decided to play with the genetic equivalent of a Ouija board and here we are—discussing whether or not it’s even a smart idea. Is bringing back extinct species the answer to our modern dilemmas, or are we just creating new problems? Here at The Onion, we decided to take a humorous stab at decoding the whole mess. So, buckle up, grab your popcorn—and okay, maybe a rock or two—because the wonders of genetic engineering have just made the zoo a wilder place. <a href="LEARN MORE“>Press here to delve deeper into this scientific comedy show.Colossal Biosciences claims it has brought back the dire wolf, a species that went extinct thousands of years ago, by editing the genes of gray wolves. The Onion examines the pros and cons of resurrecting extinct species.

PRO: No other problems for science to tackle right now

CON: Some of them are bugs

PRO: New animals at the zoo to huck rocks at

CON: Woolly mammoths ill-equipped for modern service economy

PRO: Would be interesting to see how cat interacts with ankylosaur

CON: Not enough krill to go around

PRO: Get to call the dodo ugly to its face

CON: Who’s gonna walk them?