Why Were Bezos’ Wedding Guests Handed Personalized Pee Bottles?

Ever wondered what happens when you fuse Italian extravagance, billionaire eccentricity, and a dash of good ol’ bodily urgency into one wildly memorable event? Well, just try picturing Jeff Bezos tying the knot in Venice, surrounded by A-list guests, shimmering canals…and complimentary monogrammed pee bottles. Let me be the first to confess—I’ve been to some unforgettable weddings, but never one where the real panic was deciding whether to save your dance moves or your dignity . There’s something hilariously poetic about celebrating everlasting love and asking Leonardo DiCaprio to moonwalk while ankle deep in…well, not champagne! Is this peak luxury, peak absurdity, or just Amazon Prime logistics at work? Honestly, it’s hard not to stand in awe—assuming you’re allowed to stand at all—of this wedding’s commitment to keeping things moving, literally and figuratively . Ready to find out how the world’s richest man made restroom breaks a premium event amenity? LEARN MORE

VENICE, ITALY—In a welcome bag filled with favors such as local chocolates, artisanal soaps, and scented candles, guests arriving for the wedding of Amazon founder Jeff Bezos and Lauren Sánchez this week were reportedly given monogrammed plastic bottles in which to urinate during the ceremony. “Because guests will be strictly prohibited from leaving the room at any time during the festivities, the couple have provided these custom-made bottles as a token of their appreciation.” wedding planner Lucia Contarini said as she showed off a makeshift urine receptacle emblazoned with the initials “J” and “L,” noting that it would be the only option available to attendees who did not wish to wet themselves when they inevitably needed to empty their long-held bladders. “We ask that guests also save some room in the bottle for the reception, because the groom has requested the dance floor be full at all times and no one will be permitted a bathroom break.” At press time, the dancing had been in progress for hours, and witnesses confirmed an exhausted Leonardo DiCaprio was completely drenched in urine and struggling to continue moving to the beat of “Uptown Funk.”