When Girlfriends Drew the Line: 16 Men Who Abandoned Female Friends and What Happened Next
Ever been cornered with the classic “It’s either me or them!” ultimatum? Yeah, that eye-roll-worthy moment when your significant other basically demands you choose sides — and not in a friendly game of Monopoly. Now, while guys often get called out for crossing lines, let’s not kid ourselves; women can stir the pot just as well, spinning real-life drama out of thin air. Recently, a Reddit thread asked men if their girlfriends ever told them to cut ties with female friends — and man, the stories poured in like a season finale cliffhanger. Heartbreak, confusion, and enough drama to rival a soap opera filled the replies, exposing everything from jealous outbursts to the tightrope walk between trust and control. So, what’s the deal—are these ultimatums a sign of genuine concern, or just a control freak’s playbook? Buckle up, ’cause this one’s a wild ride. LEARN MORE
“It’s either me or them!” Have you ever been given an ultimatum like that? Well, some folks out there sure know what I’m talking about. While we often hear about men being the ones to cross the line, let’s not pretend women are incapable of making people’s heads spin.
Recently, one Redditor opened the floor with a loaded question: “Men, has your girlfriend ever demanded you cut off a female friend?” And the responses didn’t disappoint. A mix of heartbreak, confusion and a whole lot of drama made the cut.
More info: Reddit
I had a friend who got really interested in me after meeting my now wife, back when my wife was still my gf. She would cross boundaries, try to invite me to things alone without her fiancé and without my gf.
My gf expressed this to me multiple times but I ignored it for a long time. Eventually I saw the forest for the trees and ended the friendship and kept the relationship. The drama did end.
A lot of people saying to end the relationship and keep the friendship. If the friendship is truly that, then yes it may be a control thing for your partner. But if there is more going on, a second look may be required.
More context required and each situation is different.
No, the drama never ends.
First it was exes that I was friendly with. Then it was co-workers and other women in my hobby (adult rec sport, like half the women were gay anyhow). Then it was family members. And it was my possessions, replaced with “our” things (that she demanded in the breakup…)
It’s all about control. They want control and are compelled to try to isolate you to achieve that.
Set firm boundaries and enforce them and walk away from anyone who won’t agree to them. That’s the only solution. .
This ultimatum was graciously presented to me twice in my life. You should’ve seen the look on their faces when I picked my friends.
I entertained her various ultimatums for a while. Even into our brief marriage. The choosing friends thing was our breaking point. A long time female friend of mine was hospitalized and a bunch of other friends and I went to visit her. Ex-wife told me i couldnt go see her. I went anyway because thats what friends do. I even asked ex- wife to come along which she refused. When I got home the ex-wife was furious, accused me of cheating, and slathered on the insults and in her fit of rage she demanded a divorce to which I agreed without hesitation. I believe she was bluffing to try and get her way but at that point I was over it.
If there’s no trust, there’s no relationship. If you don’t trust each other enough to be around other people, you’re not building a relationship for the real world. A world with other men and women living in it.
If you think your partner isn’t capable of controlling their sexual urges around other people, maybe a relationship isn’t a good idea. Whether it’s real, or all in your mind doesn’t matter. You’ll never have trust.
Unless the friend is clearly objectively problematic, then this is an unreasonable request and not one I’d ever entertain.
It’s a short term win. I guess it depends on how close you are to your friend. Some men die on the hill of “we’re just friends and you can’t control me”. Which is valid in principle, no one should feel controlled.
I’ve done it both ways where I caved in one instance and stood my ground on the second with the same girlfriend/wife.
When she and I were just dating I had a friend she was jealous of and I agreed to stop contacting said friend. My relationship with my gf at the time improved because she was happy I chose her.
Later after we were married and our relationship was on the rocks she went through my phone and saw conversations I was having with a female friend I’ve known for 30 years. She told me to get rid of her and I said no. My marriage was already falling apart and I wasn’t going to alienate another friend.
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