Biohacker Bryan Johnson’s Workout Stopped Cold by Shocking Coffee Mishap—What Went Wrong?
If immortality had a mascot, would it drink decaf? Bryan Johnson—a man whose biological age allegedly stopped aging when Facebook was cool—has made headlines again, only this time it’s not for injecting himself with young blood or tracking his own erection stats (no, seriously, he does that). Instead, the self-declared biohacker is catching heat… because he bailed on his gym session after accidentally sipping a caffeinated coffee. If that doesn’t make you feel better about skipping your morning run for “reasons,” what will? The same guy who’s turned his body into a full-time science project—sometimes pitting his health data against his own son’s—has proven he’s still, uncomfortably, human. Maybe everlasting youth is no match for a rogue cup of espresso. But hey, now that Bryan’s found love and ditched his so-called “bedroom divorce,” could a little extra normalcy be his most controversial move yet? LEARN MORE
Bryan Johnson’s approach to his own health has always been a controversial one but his latest move has earned him a lot of backlash online.
The world-famous bio-hacker has made it clear that he wants to live forever and he’s willing to do whatever it takes to make that happen, even if the internet might ridicule him for it.
It seems as if getting a girlfriend has loosened up the 49-year-old somewhat as he recently eased up on his strict sleep routine to bring an end to their ‘bedroom divorce‘.
And now he’s even sacrificing time in the gym, although he has since blamed it on accidentally having a caffeinated coffee before bed which led to him tossing and turning for the wrong reasons.
On X, he wrote: “Wrecked sleep last night. Cafe mistakenly gave me fully caffeinated coffee versus decaf.
“Cancelled my morning dunk training as acute sleep disruption can increase injury risk by 70-130 per cent.”
Having a poor night’s sleep is probably a fair justification for missing the gym or not feeling your best at work but considering Johnson has long boasted about having a biological age of 18, you’d imagine that it’s the sort of thing that wouldn’t bother him. Although it does at least prove that he’s human.
Bryan Johnson with his girlfriend in a selfie (X/bryan_johnson)
Bodybuilder Michael Duggan quoted Johnson’s tweet and wrote: “Man claims to have a biological age of 18. Cancels workout because he accidentally drank a coffee.
“Meanwhile actual 18 year olds are showing up to the gym hungover after staying out til 4am and doing a dozen shots the night before.”
Even if teenagers are drinking far less these days, Duggan does raise a fair point about the ability of an 18-year-old to head on multiple nights out in a row and still exercise and head to lectures, but maybe I’m just thinking back on my own first year at university a bit too much there.
Unsurprisingly, Johnson had plenty of health data to back up his decision to ditch the gym, suggesting that his restorative sleep was down by 20 per cent despite spending an extra two hours in bed. It happens to the best of us Bryan.
While Johnson is unlikely to live forever because of the laws of science, the money and effort he has invested in making himself feel younger will probably pay off and give him a nice long life, although he will have to negotiate his recent diagnosis with an incurable stomach disease.
Johnson was called out for missing his usual morning workout (Kyle Grillot/Bloomberg via Getty Images)
“As a kid, I ate sugar cereal, drank sugary soda, and gobbled down fast food. I had a few healthy years in my early 20s but then became a young father of three and began building a business,” he wrote on X.
“Juggling that stress and grind, I let my health slip and gained 40 lbs. Within a few years I’d fallen into a deep, chronic depression.
“Somewhere in that timeline, my body began developing an autoimmune process affecting my thyroid and then my stomach lining.
“It’s called Autoimmune Gastritis (AIG).”
Bryan Johnson’s wildest experiments in his quest to ‘live forever’
De-ageing his penis
Johnson has been working on his Johnson (YouTube/Bryan Johnson)
While the thought of it may make you wince, Johnson has been putting his manhood through the wringer in the hopes of bringing back his ’22-year-old penis’. From semen analysis and blood flow testing to Botox injections and shock wave therapy, he seems to have done it all.
The biohacker claimed to have been able to lower his ‘erection age’ by over half thanks to this long-winded ritual.
As well as keeping track of his own ‘erection data’, Johnson has also been controversially comparing the stats to his 19-year-old son’s.
Injecting himself with his son’s blood
The three generations came together for the experiment (YouTube/Bryan Johnson)
The biohacker went viral in 2023 after sharing that he’d come together with his then-17-year-old son and his 70-year-old father to take part in what he described as ‘the world’s first multigenerational plasma exchange‘.
The process saw Johnson have a litre of his blood removed and separated the plasma. He then had the same amount of his son’s plasma infused into his veins.
However, after seeing ‘no benefits’, Johnson announced he was ‘no longer injecting my son’s blood‘.
Instead, he said he ‘upgraded’ to ‘total plasma exchange’.
Psychedelics
Johnson while on shrooms (X/bryan_johnson)
Last year, the biohacker documented his trip after taking 5g of magic mushrooms. Afterwards, he admitted he was ‘happy to be alive’, and the experience had ‘changed’ him, but ‘probably not as you’d expect’.
Johnson also shared the effects of taking 27mg of the ‘world’s most powerful’ hallucinogenic, 5-MeO-DMT, which left him ‘stunned beyond comprehension’.
An extensive morning routine
He exercises for 90 minutes (YouTube/Bryan Johnson)
Johnson recently shared an update on what he does each morning, noting that it takes four hours and 46 minutes.
“My morning routine is always evolving as we update protocols. This is what I’m experimenting with right now,” he writes on his website.
1. Wake up around 5 am
2. Oral hygiene
3. Light in eyes
4. Breath work
5. Pre-workout nutrition
6. Exercise
7. Sauna
8. Red/NIR light therapy
9. Focused shockwave therapy on joints
10. Shower
11. Hair growth serum
12. Skincare
13. Breakfast
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