Bond’s New Face: Who Are the 6 Secretive Stars—and the Mysterious Ferret—Competing for 007?
Is it just me, or does the world suddenly seem a whole lot more mysterious when you realize James Bond might soon be played by—wait for it—a ferret? I never thought I’d be writing the words “suave” and “ferret” in the same sentence, but here we are . If you’ve ever found yourself wondering what 007 would look like slinking across casino floors with a tail twitch instead of a tux adjustment, you’re in good company. Amazon MGM Studios, in what might be Hollywood’s boldest casting twist since they let Daniel Craig keep his own hair, is seriously eyeing not just six dapper actors but a furry, one-year-old contender named Noodle . Honestly, with the way things are going, who’s to say this whiskered secret agent doesn’t have a license to thrill—and chew through gadget wires? Dive into the delightful absurdity and find out how a Petco recruit is out-charming the competition! LEARN MORE.
CULVER CITY, CA—Amidst intense speculation over who would next portray the iconic secret agent, a source within Amazon MGM Studios revealed Wednesday that producers had narrowed down their list of James Bond candidates to six actors and one extremely suave ferret. “Some of the biggest names in Hollywood are in the running, but a dark horse contender from Petco is making a big impression,” said the anonymous source, who noted that producers of the spy franchise were enchanted by the small, long-bodied mammal named Noodle the moment he slunk into the audition. “Jack Lowden or Regé-Jean Page may seem like obvious choices for the new 007, but Noodle has that je ne sais quoi. There’s an air of mystery in those beady eyes. Sure, he’s not British, which might upset some fans. But he’s signaled he’s willing to do all his own stunts as long as there are treats nearby. And you’ve got to admit he’d look great in a bow tie. Besides, we’re leaning toward casting a fresh face, and this guy is only 1 year old.” At press time, Callum Turner was reportedly squeezing himself into a burrow to appear more ferret-like.
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