“Conflicted Emotions: Why a Biological Mom is Urging Her Son to Drop the ‘Mom’ Label”
Navigating a relationship with birth parents can be complicated but worth it
While many adoptees will be eager to find and contact their biological parents once they become adults, figuring out how to navigate this new relationship can be difficult. The adopted child will likely have a long list of questions to ask their biological parents, and they might even harbor resentment about being given up for adoption.
And of course, there’s the issue of what’s an appropriate title for the birth parents to be called. According to Julie McGue, it’s completely up to the adoptee (and their biological parents if they have a relationship) to decide what to call one another. Julie shared that she used to refer to her biological mom as “birth mom” or “birth mother,” but many also use biological mom, bio-mom, B-mom, first mother, other mother, natural mother.
At the end of the day, it doesn’t really matter what title is chosen as long as a healthy relationship can be created. AdoptUSKids notes on their site that having contact with birth parents can provide children with a variety of benefits. They will be less anxious about the “what ifs” when they have access to information, and they will better understand their history. They also will likely have higher self-esteem, as they don’t have to wonder about the reason why their parents chose to give them up.
We would love to hear your thoughts on this story in the comments below, pandas. Do you think this woman did anything wrong by setting boundaries with her birth son? Feel free to share, and then if you’re interested in checking out another Bored Panda piece featuring stories from adopted children, look no further than right here.
