“Desperate Dilemma: Can a Town Save Their Stubborn Mule Trapped in the Barn Before It’s Too Late?”

"Desperate Dilemma: Can a Town Save Their Stubborn Mule Trapped in the Barn Before It’s Too Late?"

In the charmingly peculiar hamlet of Ranburne, Alabama, residents have found themselves at a genuine loss for solutions—what do you do when a hefty mule named Cloppy gets itself wedged halfway through a barn door? After hours of brainstorming (and let’s be real, quite a lot of cursing), the townsfolk basically threw in the towel, declaring their collective intelligence officially exhausted. As neighbor Verne Colton huffed and puffed trying to wiggle the two-thousand-pound beast free, onlookers were left scratching their heads and wondering: Is there anything messier than a barnyard rescue gone awry? From inventive tugging tactics involving pig grease to the surreal moment when the mayor’s even plumper mule got stuck alongside Cloppy, this saga has turned into a full-blown comedic spectacle that seems to defy logic. So, settle in and enjoy the wild ride of a little town determined to outsmart their stubborn livestock—because if there’s one thing to learn here, it’s that farmyard dilemmas have a funny way of getting complicated fast! <a href="https://theonion.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/TownWithHeavysetNIBIHA_GR-R.jpg”>LEARN MORE

RANBURNE, AL—Concluding an hours-long summit with top thinkers from the area, residents of a town with a heavyset mule stuck halfway through a barn door declared Thursday that they’re plumb out of ideas.

The townsfolk, who were spotted scratching their chins and shaking their heads, had reportedly convened around the rear end of a stout mule after hearing neighbor Verne Colton cussing up a storm while pushing with all his might on the hindquarters of his 2,000-pound animal, Cloppy, in order to free her from the dang barn door. 

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