“Dining in the Ashes: What Gavin Newsom’s Nobu Visit Reveals About His Hidden Agenda”
California Governor Gavin Newsom found himself in sizzling hot water—literally!—after a dinner misstep that’s got everyone shaking their heads. While wildfires raged across Los Angeles, our fearless leader decided it was the perfect moment to chow down on some high-end sushi at the charred remains of Nobu. I mean, who doesn’t love a meal served with a side of smoke and ash? But, as Governor Newsom sheepishly admitted, dining during a disaster is about as tone-deaf as wearing white after Labor Day! Just imagine the scene: flames licking the walls and him thinking, “Hmm, is this a new type of flambé?” It’s a real head-scratcher—how could anyone think that dining in a disaster zone is a good idea? Talk about a fiery faux pas! Want to dive deeper into this calamity of comedic proportions? <a href="https://theonion.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/GavinNewsomNIBIHAGR.jpg”>LEARN MORE.
LOS ANGELES—Admitting that he regretted his actions given the devastation wrought by wildfires through much of the Los Angeles area, California Gov. Gavin Newsom apologized Thursday after he was spotted dining at the smoldering remains of Nobu. “Despite strict evacuation orders, my staff and I did in fact attend a dinner party within the burnt ruins of a high-end sushi restaurant,” said Newsom, adding that as governor he had a moral duty to decline the invitation and take the threat of the fires far more seriously. “As soon as I sat down at the table and saw that our food was on fire, I knew it was a mistake. Rather than enjoy the meal while the restaurant ignited, burst into flame, and collapsed to the ground, I should have left Nobu the second we smelled smoke.” At press time, Newsom also apologized for his earlier comments claiming that the dinner at Nobu had taken place in a sealed, concrete room where fire was unable to spread.
