Discover How These 50 Acts of Compassion Redefine What It Means to Be a Man
I love this kind of positive masculinity. None of this, “tough it out, don’t be scared,” stuff, but “if you get scared, here’s what to do and remember I’m here to keep you safe.” I think it’s a message that’s great for any kid, but especially boys. They need to know they’re allowed to have big feelings and learn how to deal with them. I think that dad demonstrated it all brilliantly in just a few sentences.
I think Keanu Reeves is basically the gold standard for positive masculinity. Doesn’t sport the typical Hollywood “tough guy” ego. He’s genuinely humble, respects boundaries (remember the famous hover hand) and openly shares his grief. And he quietly spends millions helping crew members and charities without having to brag about it. Compassion and kindness and an absolute movie tough.
While these qualities can encourage dependability and a strong sense of responsibility, they can also create unrealistic expectations when a man’s value becomes dependent on his income, authority, or ability to remain composed in every situation.
Men who struggle financially or experience uncertainty may feel that they have failed to meet society’s standards. Similarly, boys who are naturally sensitive or prefer expressing their emotions may face ridicule for not fitting conventional ideas of masculinity. Such pressures can make it difficult for men to recognize that there is more than one way to be strong or responsible.
My step-dad. Six foot six. Three hundred pounds of pure muscle. Giant beard. Large arm sleeve tattoos. Worked in construction his whole life. A few days ago he was wearing a dress and makeup because my younger sisters wanted to make him pretty.
Steve “The Crocodile Hunter” Irwin. One of my personal heroes. His entire family are all amazing people that world could use about a billion more of.
Qualities such as resilience, ambition, and self-reliance can be valuable, but they become problematic when men are expected to hide their fears, refuse help, or prioritize winning over everything else. The pressure to appear tough at all times can also discourage men from showing tenderness or admitting that they are struggling.
Instead of allowing men to develop a healthy range of emotional responses, these expectations can leave them feeling that they must constantly demonstrate their strength to earn respect.
Can’t believe anyone hasn’t said Nick Offerman yet. Comes across as a super manly “Man’s Man” yet is in touch with his emotions, deeply loves his wife and isn’t afraid to show it, and at least outwardly appears to be a very accepting person. I think he’s a prime example of positive masculinity.
I think Milo Rossi (science communicator on YouTube) is a great example. Fights pseudoscience, makes a point to be ethical with his merch, advocates for remembering that ancient people were just like us, while being a bringing big masculine goofball energy.
Aragorn from The Lord of the Rings. He is a elite warrior and capable leader, yet he feels no need to posture, never suppresses his emotions, genuinely grieves for his fallen companions, respects the strength and autonomy of women, and openly expresses non-romantic love and physical affection toward his male peers without a shred of insecurity.
Unexpressed feelings may also emerge as irritability, withdrawal, reckless behavior, or aggression. Toxic masculinity can further encourage men to measure their worth through wealth, physical toughness, or their ability to exert power over others.
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