“Exposed Secrets: The Shocking Consequences of Hiding Pets from Landlords!”
F**k them.
My roommate had a fluffy orange cat already, and about two months into living together I adopted a old man tuxedo kitty from the shelter. I don’t know why I never mentioned it to the landlady, she was a wacky hippie type who lived an hour away and almost never came to the apartment. But eventually, my roommate broke the lease and moved out of state, and I stayed til the end of the lease. When the landlady came by for the final check when I was moving out, she looked at my black and white cat and said “Huh, I could’ve sworn your cat was orange! Guess I gotta slow down on the pot.” I did not correct her lol.
My landlord found out when a repair guy saw my dog’s bed during a routine check. I tried playing it off as if I was just pet-sitting, but the landlord didn’t buy it. They ended up charging me a pet deposit retroactively, which was better than getting kicked out.
I had a hamster in military barracks. I stole his wheel because it squeaked when we had room inspections and hid the cage under my sink (only during inspections, outside of that he has a wheel and sun!) I was overseas so he was already old when I adopted him (families can basically drop off unwanted pets at the vet there for other families coming in to adopt as they come in) but he died before I was caught. We had a funeral for him and I painted a tea box black and we snuck out behind the laundry room and buried him under the cover of night and a friend sang a little song. RIP Sybil!!
I got a ferret next but I left and gave him away before I was caught. Word got around I was getting away with it and this d*****s got a cat and did get caught. Standard military paperwork for being in trouble and had to get rid of the cat.
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