“Family Tensions Explode: Daughter Questions Her Morality After Refusing to Help Pay Rent for Dad’s Ex and Brother”
Strong boundaries are what help you maintain healthy relationships. If they’re missing, things start going wrong
Image credits: Baptista Ime James/Unsplash (not the actual photo)
Boundaries really do matter. You might think they’re unnecessary in a family context, but that’s not quite right. Sure, you can afford to be more flexible with your boundaries when it comes to close family and friends, but if you completely get rid of them, those relationships can quickly turn toxic.
In other words, you should never allow yourself to be in a position where someone constantly oversteps your boundaries, disrespects your values, and ignores your needs and wants.
If this keeps happening, you need to try to reestablish your boundaries and, if that doesn’t work, reevaluate your relationship with the other person.
Without accusing the other person, tell them how their behavior affects you and what you’d like your relationship to look like in the future. Be direct but diplomatic. Get on the same page. Though it might be awkward, state the consequences that will happen if they continue with their behavior.
For example, if they keep pressuring you for money, you could tell them you’ll cut off all communication for a while.
On top of that, you’re not obligated to help someone deal with their financial problems if that means that it’ll affect your quality of life. You are not responsible for fixing another adult’s mess-ups.
A good rule of thumb is to live below your means and spend less than you earn. If rent is way too expensive, find a cheaper place to live
Image credits: Faruk TokluoÄŸlu/Unsplash (not the actual photo)
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