“From Awkward Slips to Epic Fails: Unforgettable Tales of Embarrassment That Will Leave You Cringing!”
My first ever job out of university was working for a consultancy in London, and it had an open plan office where we were all sat and could hear all and see all. It was quite a stuffy environment as you might expect, very old school place.
Anyway on the end of my FIRST day, I went to go home, I had my headphones in already and I tried to say “Ok, bye guys!” to the people near me.
What actually happened was me shouting “OK BYE GAYS!” at the top of my lungs to the entire floor.
Without looking, when I was a young teen, I started walking with another family in the supermarket right next to their trolley. I only realised as I was about to put a bag of crisps in their trolley and got an awkward look from Not-My-Mum lady.
I scarpered, never seen them since, I often wonder what life would have been like..
During a work conversation about musical instruments we’d learned when we were young, a Chinese colleague said she’d played the piano. I asked whether she’d learned Chopsticks. I had precisely no thought for the connection, until everyone sort of just moved away from disgusting racist me.
When I was maybe 8 or so I really fancied this girl in my class but she was ‘going out’ with my best friend at the time. One day they broke up, as kids do, and I saw my chance. Asked her out, she said yes, and I invited her to mine to hang out one afternoon. I figured I needed to buy her a gift so I went to New Look and found a hot pink necklace that said ‘sexy’. That’s perfect, I thought! Bought it for all of two quid and showed my mum when I got home. She laughed and told me it was highly inappropriate for an 8 year old. Gave it to her anyway and she broke up with me because she didn’t like it.
edit: should add that i ended up a flaming homo so, was probably for the best.
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