Furious Over Clock’s Low Value, Trump Slashes PBS Budget—What’s Really Behind the Move?

Have you ever wondered whether presidential authority extends to vengeance on national treasures… over a botched Antiques Roadshow appraisal? Well, buckle up, because in a plot twist that could only happen in 21st-century America (or a fever dream after binge-watching too many reality shows), Donald Trump is apparently ready to pull PBS’s funding just because a “vintage” family heirloom turned out to be more QVC than Quincy Adams. It’s one thing to get a surprise at Antiques Roadshow—maybe your grandma’s vase holds $1,000, maybe it’s from IKEA—but it’s quite another when the “commander-in-chief” storms off and whips out his executive order pad. Honestly, do you think any previous president has ever let a sour appraisal alter the course of national funding? The clock may be ticking, but the comedy’s timeless—especially when you imagine a grown man scraping off a “Made in China” sticker in the Oval Office. Sometimes, satire just feels like a documentary. LEARN MORE

WASHINGTON—Signing the executive order just minutes after storming off the set, President Donald Trump revoked federal funding for PBS this week after his grandfather clock reportedly received a lower-than-expected Antiques Roadshow appraisal. “For Christ’s sake, $2,500?” said a visibly flabbergasted Trump, who appeared to grow more and more irate as the appraiser explained that the longcase clock was likely a reproduction from the 1980s and not the 19th-century family heirloom the commander-in-chief had claimed it was. “This is solid walnut, handcrafted in the Black Forest. This thing is worth $25,000 at the least. You must be out of your mind. You’re crazy. What are your qualifications, anyway? You people will never see a cent out of me again.” At press time, sources confirmed Trump was scraping the “Made in China” sticker off the clock.