“Is the Political Arena Just a Ruse? Trump Reveals Shocking WWE-Inspired Plot with Cody Rhodes!”
In a shocking revelation that sounds like it’s ripped straight from the pages of a wrestling script, President-elect Donald Trump has confessed that his entire political career has been nothing but a setup for an epic showdown with wrestling sensation Cody Rhodes. Can you believe it? From his foray into the Reform Party way back in ’99 to the wild conspiracy theories surrounding Obama, it turns out all roads led to this moment: a winner-takes-all bout to determine who really wears the crown in the ring—or, you know, the White House. With Trump’s flair for the dramatic, he’s announced this clash as “the greatest match of all time,” leaving us all pondering—has politics been just another arena all along? The anticipation is palpable, and the stakes couldn’t be higher. So, buckle up, folks! Trump’s about to deliver a smackdown like you’ve never seen… just hope those body slams don’t land him in the hospital! For the full scoop on this bizarre narrative unfold, <a href="https://theonion.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/TrimpAdmitsEntireNIBIHA_GR.webp”>LEARN MORE.
PALM BEACH, FL—Revealing that the stage was first set in 1999 with his short-lived Reform Party run, President-elect Donald Trump admitted Friday that his entire political career has been a WWE storyline to set up a match with Cody Rhodes. “Everything, from the Obama trutherism to retaking the White House, has been building to this: the greatest match of all time, between me and that no good son of a bitch Cody Rhodes,” said Trump, grabbing a reporter’s microphone and looking straight into the camera as he explained how years of public life had paved the way for a winner-take-all battle for the belt that would determine who would be the most powerful man in the country. “You thought China was in trouble? Just wait until I get my hands on Rhodes. American Nightmare, where the hell are you? Get your ass to the Capitol. Papa Trump is about to bring the hurt.” At press time, Trump had reportedly been admitted to Walter Reed Medical Center after Rhodes delivered an especially nasty Alabama slam.
