“Shocking Confession: Tucker Carlson Reveals Terrifying Encounter with a ‘Demonic Presence’ That Left Him Soaked and Spellbound”

In an utterly bizarre twist of fate that sounds like it was pulled straight from a late-night sketch, Tucker Carlson finds himself drenched in more than just controversy this week. The former Fox News host has claimed that while he was peacefully snoozing away, a demon decided to have a little fun by, uh, urinating on him. Yes, you read that correctly! According to Tucker, this “transformative experience” felt like a literal awakening—though I suspect most of us would prefer a gentle nudge from our alarm clock instead of an encounter with an evil spirit’s bathroom habits! As he bravely ventured into the realms of faith, and apparently soaked boxers, Carlson’s claims raise a delightful question: could insomnia just be a sign you’re haunted? For those intrigued by Tucker’s strange nocturnal revelations, you can always dive deeper into the deluge of this story. LEARN MORE.

BRYANT POND, ME—Describing the moment as a “transformative experience” that inspired him to embrace God and read the Bible, a piss-soaked Tucker Carlson claimed Friday that a demon had urinated on him while he was sleeping. “One moment I was asleep in bed, and the next, my boxers were absolutely soaked with what could only be the urine of an evil spirit,” said the former Fox News host, who added that while he did not previously consider himself a religious person, everything changed when he woke up to a rush of hot liquid covering his groin. “Lying there, I felt this terrible pressure in my bladder, almost as if a demon was sitting on it. Then it unleashed a torrent of urine that drenched my pajamas and my mattress, which still bear the scars.” At press time, Carlson claimed that embracing God had successfully helped ward off every evil spirit except for the one that occasionally visits him and covers the inside of his underwear in semen.