“Trapped Under the Chopper: 40 Adults Reveal the Dark Truths of Growing Up with Helicopter Parents”
Image credits: leozh
#34
I am used to *report* everything happening in my life over dinner… until now that I'm 26 I still feel the need to contact them in any form on a daily basis just to tell them how my life is. I never made any major life decision without their *consent*.
I moved out and rent an apartment in the city near my job for more than five years now, but I am still heavily dependent on them (and them to me). I go back to my parents house every weekend and holidays. I also pay for all our bills, grocery, other needs. In my mind, I'm just paying up my debt to them for raising me and because I love them and I have *nothing* else in my life. They made my life so much easy, even if we were poor and my dad barely make minimum wage so now that I'm working I feel very much obliged to repay them for all their sacrifices.
I think I would say, I am co-dependent to them in every ways. I still feel like a child. How should I fix me?
Image credits: rednryt
#35
Politely yet firmly remind my otherwise lovely mother that it is my business if I have soda in my refrigerator, and if it really bothers her she doesn’t have to visit my house. She knows she’s pretty imperfect and has gotten a lot better, but given that her parents were alcoholics it’s not surprising that the only way she knows how to love someone is by trying to control them. My parents divorced when I was 10, and, while I spent roughly half my time with each parent, my dad decided he wasn’t going to be bothered with instilling any sort of discipline in me or my brother, so my mom, feeling she needed to compensate for that, turned into the kind of parent who would email my high school teachers every single day to see if I had turned in all my assignments, track keystrokes on my computer, and not allow me to have a password on my phone or take it into my room until I started paying my own phone bill. I didn’t talk to her for a few years, but now I get where she was coming from and I don’t blame her for who she is, even if it’s annoying. The best way to deal with it is to understand why it’s there and politely confront it.
