“Trump’s Unexpected Move: Autographs Bible at Swearing-In, Leaves Justice Roberts in Shock!”

As President-elect Donald Trump prepared for his second inauguration, he managed to turn the solemn occasion into a moment of whimsical absurdity. Picture this: the chief justice, John Roberts, standing poised with the inaugural Bible, ready to administer the oath, when suddenly, Trump pulls out a Sharpie and transforms the holy text into his own autograph book! With a flourish, he scribbles his signature, casually offering to add a note to his “good friend Robert” before brushing it off like he’s just finished signing a baseball at a charity game. Is this a fleeting moment of comedic madness, or a reflection of how Trump’s unorthodox style continues to permeate the highest offices of the land? Buckle up—it’s going to be a wild ride framing the sacred with the sensational! <a href="https://theonion.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/ConfusedTrumpNIBIHAGR.jpg”>LEARN MORE.

WASHINGTON—Hampering the chief justice’s efforts to swear him in for a second term, President-elect Donald Trump autographed the inaugural Bible before handing it back to John Roberts, sources confirmed Monday. “There you go—all yours,”  said Trump, who took the Bible from Roberts, pulled a Sharpie out of his suit pocket, opened the book, and scribbled his signature across the title page. “I wrote this in 1997. It’s a good one too. You want a note? I can add a note too. ‘To my good friend Robert.’ All right. Take care, now.” At press time, Trump was reportedly annoyed that the chief justice was still standing there staring expectantly at him.