“Unseen Shields: Revolutionary Strategies the Secret Service Could Implement to Fortify Trump’s Security”
Teach Trump the catch-a-bullet-in-your-mouth trick: If David Blaine could do it, then so can our 45th president.Â
Tweet âIf anyone wants to kill Trump, please let us know, thank you,â from the official Secret Service account: Giving potential assassins the opportunity to come forward on their own first only makes sense. Â
Transport Trump in a big suitcase: No one would suspect a thing.
More team bonding: While not directly tied to Trumpâs safety, wouldnât it be nice if the whole Secret Service team did a bowling night or something? Everyone has been so tightly wound lately.
Change his shoes mid-journey: Even the most skilled tracker will be thrown off by the sudden change in footprints.
Let him wear his Spider-Man costume: Trump knows that Spider-Man is powerful enough to stop bad guys, so being in the costume will help him feel more safe.
Experiment with a four-day workweek: While it may seem counterintuitive at first, studies have shown it can lead to increased productivity and focus among many workers.
Fake his death: Nobody will try to kill a president if they think heâs already dead.
Establish a second, more secret service: And if that fails, a third.
The post Ways Secret Service Can Improve Trumpâs Security appeared first on The Onion.
