Are Meta’s New Glasses Too Lifelike? Blink Reminder Feature Sparks Uncanny Valley Fears
Ever catch yourself staring in the mirror and secretly wondering, “Does Mark Zuckerberg blink when nobody’s watching?” I mean, maybe it’s just me, but the uncanny valley seems to have a permanent zip code in Menlo Park lately . Now, strap in—because in the wildest twist since Facebook made everyone’s mom your online friend, Meta’s newest smart glasses update drops the mic with a feature that prompts you to blink. Yes, blink. Like, as if not blinking was the only thing keeping us from fitting in at the local book club—or from being mistaken for androids quietly plotting the fall of humanity . I’m both fascinated and, frankly, a tad unnerved imagining millions of people guided gently by technology to do the one thing we never, ever had to think about before . Is this what progress feels like? Or is it the dawning of the “there’s-actually-nothing-left-for-humans-to-do-themselves” era? Either way, if you feel like blinking (or laughing, or crying mechanical tears), you’ll need to see what Meta has in store—just don’t forget to, you know, blink . LEARN MORE
MENLO PARK, CA—Touting the new software update as a staggering innovation no other wearable technology could offer, CEO Mark Zuckerberg announced Wednesday that Meta’s smart glasses would now remind users to blink to appear human. “Every 30 to 60 seconds, our revolutionary heads-up display will prompt wearers to slowly close and then reopen their eyes to create the illusion of natural blinking,” said Zuckerberg, adding that he himself was glad to have one less humanlike task to remember to perform. “Thanks to Meta’s powerful artificial intelligence, myself and millions of other users are one step closer to convincing the people around us that we’re just regular human beings with nothing to hide. Never before has any wearable technology made it so simple and easy to deceive the Earthlings. I personally use this feature all the time.” Zuckerberg also promised that the next version of Meta glasses would dispense water droplets at key moments to mimic “pathetic” human emotions.
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