75 Incredibly Bizarre Things Patients Uttered Under Anesthesia That Will Shock You
The very first thing he did when he started waking up was frantically rubbing his face, over and over again, horsey whispering, “Do I still have a face?!”
I managed to get my laughter under control long enough to reassure him he had both a face AND his beard was still intact!
I unfortunately lashed out under the twilight type anesthesia. Not even coming out of it, still under it. The doctors said it was a good thing I didn’t have shoes on or the kick I landed would have hurt more. They did admit it was kinda their fault though. I told them not to touch my leg (long story), and they did anyway, which is what triggered me into fighting them. I was absolutely mortified when I found out, but my husband said he wasn’t surprised at all.
A patient waking up singing “s*x b**b” by Tom jones and then asking me out on a date… I was flattered but declined and she then said “f*****g b******t, I’m moving back to America”.
Immediately after being woken up the nurses were trying to get me to eat, asking if I would like some food. My response apparently was “I love food, how do you think I got this amazing physique” (I am quite rotund).
When my mom was under once she gained awareness and heard the surgeon gossiping about someone she knew. So apparently she horrified the postop nurse by immediately going “Oh I know (Jane Smith) too!”.
When I woke up from my kidney stone removal I had hiccups from the anesthesia. The nurse said they’d pass in a minute or two, but I apparently decided to showcase my ‘talent’ for getting rid of hiccups…holding my breath. I kept trying to hold my breath and my wife kept telling me not to. I guess I had an “I’ll show you” mentality about it and kept trying.
I had a kidney stone removed and first thing i told the nurse was I dont think im into sounding. She had to walk away for a bit cause she was laughing so hard, when she came back she said that was the funniest thing she has heard in the 12 years she had worked there.
Opposite but, my anesthesiologist at a recent hysterectomy went “You nervous?” I replied with “Yeah, a little” and he goes “Not anymore! :)”
Out like a light.
Woke up from cardioversion under sedation yelling, “Hey. HEY! HEY!!” The nurse asked me what was wrong, and I replied that my chest hurt. Pause, and the nurse replied, “honey, we just shocked you.” To which I calmly said “Oh.” and passed tf out again.
I had a surgery scheduled to remove a fibroid on a snowy day and everything was way behind schedule. My surgery was delayed almost 3 hours and I was getting really impatient. My only memory after bring taken to the OR is asking the anesthesiologist if the surgeon was ever going to get things started. He laughed and told me we’d been having an awesome conversation for the past 5 minutes.
My son woke up from getting his wisdom teeth extracted and loudly announced that he would gladly rescue me if I fell into an active volcano, and also F**K DA POLICE.
Not a doctor, but apparently the surgery team were telling me to imagine a nice bundle of kittens sleeping on my chest to help calm me down beforehand, and the last thing i said before it was lights out “yeah, i f****n love cats”
Then when I woke up i greeted the doctor like he was my best friend, because I was more akin to a drunk goblin woman.
My surgery required my body cavity to be inflated with gas, and I asked the nurse afterward if they squeezed the air out of me like a whoopee cushion.
I also kept falling asleep and being overjoyed to see my husband over and over again.
After I got my wisdom teeth out, apparently I begged to keep the 2 they pulled and they let me take them home in a ziploc. once the pain meds wore off I made my mom throw them out immediately.
Apparently the last thing I said to everyone before checking out was “good luck in there” with a big thumbs up to the doctors.
Patient here — the anesthesiologist who put me under for my IVF surgery told me I said the funniest thing she’d ever heard in her entire career. She had me counting down from 10 (I only remember getting to like 6 or 7) but apparently at the very end I said “ok, you win…”.
I woke up after surgery, instantly alert and focused. Yes im sure, it was mentioned a few times afterwards. The guy in the bed next to me was going on and on about working with dogs during Vietnam. Talked about his favorite dog. As they wheeled me into the next part of recovery, I said he had lived an amazing life. She kinda laughed and said he’s about 25. So either hilarious or very eerie.
A friend was having a hip replacement and the anesthesia wore off in the midst of the surgery. She could hear banging and hammering and yelled out “What are you doing down there, building a fence?!?” Instant silence as they put her back under. Later she had a laugh with the doctor who told her she had everyone busting a gut with laughter.
I’ve only had surgery three times. I apparently really took a liking to whomever my nurse was after the first surgery, because I was apparently *very* upset that the staff “cut the tape” keeping her around when I had my second surgery at a completely separate hospital. I refused to answer their questions until they let me see her (which was not possible, since she had never worked there).
I then proceeded to pull off my part of my bandages on the drive home and walk up and down the length of our motorhome because they had told me to move around if I got sore…and I was sore. My hater husband made me sit back down when all I wanted to do was follow directions.
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