75 Incredibly Bizarre Things Patients Uttered Under Anesthesia That Will Shock You
I worked in the funeral industry and I was like 98% out of it when they transferred me to the table and my head knocked – told them that’s what a d**d person’s head sounds like. I was a fighter when I woke up.
So I live in the UK and before having a relatively minor procedure under general anesthetic I was chatting to a lovely Polish nurse about Brexit and what a s**t idea it was and how the NHS would collapse without immigration…
Flash forward to me waking from the anesthetic, really disoriented and for some reason utterly terrified. Thought I was being abducted or something. Thrashing around, nursing staff having to hold me down to prevent me hurting myself or them.
Came round properly and utterly mortified. Saw my new Polish nurse friend and apologised for being “a bit of a handful” when I came round. He said “don’t worry it’s fine, happens all the time but the racist stuff was a bit much”…
..colour drains out of my face and I think I’m going to be sick. I work for an NHS trade union in equality, diversity and inclusion. Genuinely can’t think of anything worse or more completely out of character.
Then I notice he’s smiling and he says “had you there for a minute didn’t I?!!” 😂
Well played sir, I salute you and thank you for your service to our national health service!
My 6 year old woke up from her liver transplant and told her anesthesiologist, “I don’t want a new liver anymore.” He said, “too late kiddo! You and your new liver are doing great!” 4 years later and they’re still doing great ❤️.
I feel awful and regret for ever saying it, but when I woke up from major surgery I was worried about tornadoes hitting the hospital. what would they do and how would they hide the patients. and then I said >!”I’m like d***s. I’m worth a lot. Please protect me”!
🫠.
Not an anesthesiologist, however when I had my hysterectomy I serenade the OR.
I always joke that I can sing the song “You say she’s just a friend.”
The resident I worked with at the time came to check on me in the evening and said just so know you didn’t say anything strange in the OR. Oh okay.
The next morning my Doctor came in and he had one of those smiles on…and was giggling. He said girl you are funny. I said why? He said you were singing in tge OR I said no I wasn’t…I said if I was what was it. And when he named that song I knew for sure I was.
Im still convinced I can sing that song.
Waking up from my heart surgery I apparently said “oh I’m still alive”. They thought it was funny, but my wife thought it was even funnier when they told her cause she realized my d*****d brain was trying to sing Pearl Jam’s Alive.
Okay this isn’t about a patient but about the anesthesiologist which I found SO funny. I’ve had multiple colonoscopies throughout my life and had c sections so I’ve dealt with a few anesthesiologists in my life. Most of the ones I’ve had are around the same age, 35-50 age range. They’ve all been awesome and just ask innocent questions as they sedate me so I don’t really know what’s going on as it’s happening and then I’m asleep. The last anesthesiologist I had was fairly young, and had an even younger resident with them. They were like “ok, we’re going to do sedation now” and I said okay and then as they administered it they just said “K BYEEEEE” I found it so funny 😂😂😂😂.
My mom on the table for her hysterectomy: “While you’re in there, can you get my tonsils out?”
Surgery was delayed a few minutes while they OR recomposed itself.
Surgery to remove wisdom teeth, I kept asking the nurse out on a date. I was a 14 year old boy, who had never asked anyone out before because I was scared.
I don’t remember half that day. My step dad said I was ridiculously confident and hit on several women. Like 3 random women at Walmart, the cashier at Hardee’s. .
When my 12-yo son woke up from having spinal fusion he kept on asking for Dr. Suess. Said he had to talk to him about something. 😂😂😂.
I was a scrub tech student almost 20 years ago. Was scrubbing a podiatry case, podiatry being foot. The foot being at the bottom of the body, podiatry gets put at the bottom of the food chain among surgeons. Apparently it’s a real hierarchy thing.
Anyway, this surgeon liked to use an RNFA to assist. Which for a relatively simple foot repair means I was basically window dressing. None the less, the surgeon and first assistant were fun to work with, informative, easy going, and I found the surgery fun as the anatomy of the foot isn’t something I got to see much of.
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